Highlight of the Month
-Los Angeles, CA
Most young girls look up to their mother's with complete adoration. A mother is your first role model of how womanhood looks and you witness the strength and power of what a woman is. Experiencing true love from a mother can be a blessing and a curse. If you have/had a mother like mine my story may strike a chord with you. Whenever you are faced with any kind of emotions, I want to encourage you to ask yourself three things to help you progress through it:
1. What type of emotion are you feeling?
2. When’s the first time you can remember experiencing that emotion?
3. How long have you been holding on to that emotion & is it serving you?
When I think of my mother it's hard not to light up with a smile. Some of my early memories with my mom are times of joy, celebrations, and laughter. Having a mother like her that always made sure she was present for her children & spoke verbal affirmations over them can have a lifelong lasting effect. I am the youngest of three siblings and I feel that I had the closest relationship with my mother due to the age gap between my siblings and I. There were also various life circumstances that only my mom and I embarked on which made our bond tight. Just imagine having someone in your corner that made it their life's mission to provide exposure to opportunities and aided you in achieving greatness. That's the type of support system I grew accustomed to from my early childhood into my adulthood. Believe it or not my dependency for my mother’s support was strong and it hit me like a ton of bricks when my #1 supporter was no longer present.
The last five years of my mother’s life her health constantly declined and I became her full time care provider. I am grateful I had time to prepare my heart for the dreaded day; I would no longer have the luxury to see or speak to her again but I don’t think anyone can fully prepare for a loss of that magnitude. With her being gone I found myself reflecting more often. In all honestly there were times where I was crippled with resentment. I used to feel guilty and shameful for not expressing or showing my appreciation and love for her while she was still here on earth. The more I began to feel these emotions I had to identify that I was suffering from a legitimate traumatic life event and grief was beginning to settle in. Fortunately my church offered a christian based grief group that transformed my mental healing during my grief journey.
Nowadays I reflect with love ones about memories or I replay conversations in my mind that she and I had together. There are countless times I can recall her saying "Chrissy giving up is not an option WE ARE going to achieve this goal." And even though she’s not here in the flesh, I feel her in the spirit encouraging me to keep going & follow through. By her saying comments like those it was instilled in me to always keep my word, commit to the tasks, and see it through. It's principles like those or about love, unity, and freely giving to others that she taught me which I will always hold dear to my heart. That is what gives me guidance to be the full version of myself and live with purpose by continuing to keep her spirit and legacy alive today.
Shout out to @beyoushirtoffical for curating a movement that reminds people to be themselves & live boldly.